10/19 "Black" - Pearl Jam

Letting go of love, is in a word, awful. However, Pearl Jam chose a different word to use for one of their most well-recognized songs, "Black" on their album Ten.  

To say the least, Eddie Vedder did an incredible job with this piece of writing. The lyrics are subtle while the final verse is – boom – painful as hell. Vedder describes a scene of the woman he loved, still loves, and believes he will always love.

Too bad it’s not enough.

The truth has a way of sometimes pushing people out, and in Vedder’s lyrics, it is because he genuinely want what’s best for her—even if it’s not him. It’s gut wrenching and heart aching altogether, because if he could keep her, he would. Instead, he must let her go. And the darkness that follows is almost unbearable. 

It's the darkest kind of darkness. 

Black. 

“Oh the pictures have 

All been washed in black 

Tattooed everything”

The memories feel more like knives in your chest than what you once felt when you looked at them-- and knowing it’s your own fault they no longer exist is worse. It is one of the darkest places you can go.

Vedder creates a light scene of children playing, laughter, and the things we are supposed to love. But without her, it all may as well just be empty and lacking the life it once gave him before. And although his world feels empty, he wants her to have all that she deserves in the world that he was never able to give.

The most recent person in my life, my person, said to me: “I was selfish for keeping you.”

He now may or may not face the darkness that keeps us apart, but it’s his darkness to face, as I will face mine. I am a victim of black, and my own world flipped because of another victim to the black. (Yeah, there’s another side to this story, Vedder).

Finally, the end brings the painful release. Because love is not enough and because it is selfish to hold onto someone who deserves more, you do what’s right.

You let them go.

“I know someday you’ll have a beautiful life

I know you’ll be a star in somebody else’s sky

But why can’t it be mine?”